Visiting old journal entries and feeling like it is exactly what I needed to hear...
Similarites can be found between our physical body and our psyche. When we walk through life, grasping, and clinging, clutching, and desperately trying to hang on to things that should naturally be released, we ache. We hurt. We become emotionally constricted and locked up in pain. We get tied up in knots. We lose movement in our lives and feel paralyzed.
I like what one person said about letting go: "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, you didn't lose it. If it doesn't come back, you never owned it to start with."
None of us enjoy losses. Our world system conditions us to avoid loss at all costs. We don't like to let go of something we treasure, love, value, or own. When we have to let go, it usually ends up with claw marks all over it!
Whether we like it or not, life brings us face to face with people, situations, feelings, and objects that we must release for our own good.
And so do feelings of grief. When we are grieving these losses, it helps to know that God has good counsel for us. He hasn't left us hanging.
God had made everything beautiful in its time. Even the empty spaces. Even the holes. Now that's a hard concept for me to believe when I am frantically grasping the last few strands of whatever is trying to escape my clutches. The pain involved in letting go does not feel "beautiful" to me...it feels downright miserable.
God says to us:
When you are letting go, remember that I am planting seeds of new life in you. Your grief is only for a season. My end is not Death. It is always life. I am the author of life.
These are the promises we have to hang on to when we are doing the hard work of letting go. And letting go is certainly hard work. It is often very confusing and bewildering. To break way from somone or something that we have been bonded to rips our emotions. The greater the bond the greater the pain.
Our head and our heart are usually in conflict. Our head says: This is what i need to do for my own good. Move on, I need to let go because God is telling me to let go. I need to let go for the sake of my own growth and development." But our hearts syas: "oh no you don't! It hurts too much. I can't do it. I won't do it!" Our logic and our emotions war with one another.
Letting go is a proces, not an instaneous event. it starts with an awareness that we need to let go. When our awareness increases, our pain increases.
"The truth will set you free...but first it will make you miserable."
Feeling is healing.
Letting go demands we feel and ride out our grief. If we deny, stuff, or numb ourselves, we end up camping out in our grief...and never progress beyond it. We cut ourselves off from the treasures God had hidden for us in the empty spaces.
IN our times of letting go, God is the One we need to run to, because He knowsus better than we know ourselves.
In the midst of our pain we need to run to God and say, "God, i need your help. Give me your perspective. Let my eyes see you as You see. Let my heart hear your heart. Show me what i need to do to cooperate with You in my healing."
And then dear friend, pay very close attention to the people the Lord brings across your path and the situations that present themselves. Because God will be faithful to answer those kinds of prayers...and to put His glory on display.
Angel Behind the Rocking Chair